Jackson's Camp Scholarship Fund

"Way up in the mountain tops
Touching the blue sky
There is a place I long to be"
YMCA Camp High Harbour Song

One of my favorite places on Earth is just 2 hours away from my house, here in Asheville.

You can find this little piece of Heaven nestled in the North Georgia mountains on the beautiful Lake Burton. This is where I spent every summer from 1992-2004.


I have had the opportunity to travel overseas and see much of the United States, and without question, YMCA Camp High Harbour is one of favorite places. Period.

I know that I am not alone when I make a statement like that.

I miss this place, and think about it often. Especially RIGHT NOW because it is summer time, and I know that right now little campers are finding their way to their first skill (class) of the camp week. Right about now I would be doing roll call and telling tower that we are CHECK for that skill. I could be doing any number of things like pulling out materials for an arts and crafts activity, explaining archery techniques and form (I am no Katniss Everdeen, but I can teach a decent archery class), getting ready to go on a nature walk, pulling out canoes to take a flock of campers on the water, or calming squealing campers that are ready to go out and water ski. Teaching campers something they have never done or had the courage to do, is just one of about 1,000 things I miss about this place.

I can still hear the sounds of camp. The slow creek of a cabin screen door opening and the immediate slam it makes a second later. In comes a group of excited campers ready to tell you exactly what they did in first and second skill, and how much fun they had doing it. I can hear the sounds of the dining hall right before a meal. The hum of the kitchen hard at work and the sound of upbeat music to energize the staff and campers inside preparing the meal. I can hear the sounds that the entire waterfront makes when a really great "blob" takes place--a loud splash and cheering for the latest airborne camper. I can hear the sounds of morning exercises. The sounds of counting jumping jacks and windmills, clapping after each set, and yelling at the boys and the "old lady across the lake". I can hear the sounds of night time in the mountains. The chorus of insects firing up for an evening song, the crackle of a camp fire on Wednesday nights, cabin groups doing cheers as they walk to night program, constant laughter, and even the sounds of staff members telling campers to take a shower with a few last minute reminders to not forget to clean their ears (even though the staff have not done either in, well, days).

These are just a few sounds I still hear. I could sit here and name a hundred. All of them a sweet sweet memory. All of them I would give anything to go back and relive, if just for one day. Camp is a huge part of my life that will always be so very special to me, and place that I love.

I can make the following statement:

Everything that I have learned in life, I have learned from my parents and camp.

I like to make the tennis analogy that my parents set-up the serve, and camp followed it up with a perfect ace. Camp and parents. That is how it is done. A perfect balance.

I learned how to be responsible.

I learned about honesty.

I learned about respect.

I learned how to always serve others first.

I learned individuality.

I learned how to think on my feet.

I learned how to diffuse problem situations with tact and ease.

I learned a proper handshake. I even learned how to wave and smile even when you are about to burst into flames from heat exhaustion.

I learned you should always be early to something, and never late. 

I learned that you should always tell someone how much you love and appreciate them.

I learned how to be outgoing, personable, and conversational.

I learned that you should always be yourself, and that everyone appreciates you for exactly who you are.

I learned about friendship and life-long relationships.

Above all,

I learned how to be a leader.

I had the opportunity to spend some time just the other day with a dear camp friend and his precious wife. We have known each other for years, and would say that we have been through it all together. We were not even talking about camp, and out of the blue he says, "Gosh, I miss camp. I miss it so much. Best years of life spent there."

Ditto, my sweet friend. Ditto.

In that moment, I could have cried.

Just a few weekends ago we attended a wedding of a pair of dear friends, and another one of my great camp friends was also in attendance with his fabulous wife. I asked my sweet camp friend if he ever looks at his watch and knows exactly what they are doing at camp that very moment. His response?

"Absolutely, all the time."

Ditto again.

I just had to ask.

Years and years after we have all moved on and "grown up" (yeah, right), we still think about our days at camp. We are always and forever a part of it.

(Push Off the Mat night program. A favorite. When you work with the youngest of campers, they insist on getting to paint the counselor. Fierce and fabulous war paint, or at least we liked to think so.)

The friendships I have made are of a different league.

Lifelong, quality relationships.

I think of all of them and smile. I know the impact every one of them has made on my life, and I can articulate what each of them means to me. We may not all get to be together as much as we would like, but the memories and experiences we all had together makes up for that. When we do get to see each other, it is like time never passed. I love all of them and I am grateful for all them.

I should note that I spent the majority of my camper years and the first part of my staff years at the Lake Burton site. I spent the last 3 years of camp working as a staff member at the Golden Isles site (on Jekyll Island). The site at the beach has since shut down, and moved to Lake Allatoona! Soon there will be a third site at Lake Lanier! Multiple sites, same amazing experience.

Some of my favorite memories are from my final year at camp. Summer 2004. I was the Program Director for the Leaders-In-Training (LIT) program. This program is for teenagers that are ready to be a part of the leadership program and become staff members. This program is one that they apply, interview, and then place into. They come for 3 week sessions. It is no easy program, and not every LIT becomes a staff member.

I loved this program because you have the opportunity to be a leader for amazing young people, but the sweetest part is getting to watch them grow into the most outstanding leaders. Being a leader is one thing, but watching them grow and become leaders is entirely different--it is better.

I love these kids, and I think about them often. I wonder what they are up to, and how they are doing. I do know that many of them are still with camp in higher leadership roles!

I would love to go back and have a morning devotional with all of them.  We could carry kayaks and the lifeguard stand one more time. Amazing young adults. Amazing leaders. All of them. They still make me proud. They helped shape me into who I am today, and they had no idea they were doing that at the time.

Leadership.

We have a song that we sing on closing night at camp.

It is called "Pass It On". We start the song with a single burning candle, and by the end of the song the entire amphitheater is filled with everyone's burning candles. One candle lights hundreds. No lights. Just the warm glow of candles. It is my favorite single moment of camp. It is so beautiful and so powerful. Usually, everyone is crying by this point in the evening.

It only takes a spark to get a fire going,
And soon all those around can warm up in its glowing;
That's how it is with God's Love,
Once you've experienced it,
You spread the love to everyone
You want to pass it on. 

I share this with you because this song keeps ringing in my ears lately. It is special because of its spiritual and emotional meaning, but it now has a new meaning to me.

Last week while we were at the beach, something amazing and really unbelievable happened. I received a text message from one of my dearest friends, Jennifer Lancaster aka JR. She informed me that they wanted to start a camp scholarship fund in Jackson's honor. Can you believe that?! 

I had to scrape myself off the the floor when I read the text. I even showed it to Russ because my eyes could not believe. He has never been to camp, but he married camp when he married me...and he was floored by the text.

Oh, and a plaque on the dining hall in his honor. I mean really, they had me at just the plaque.

She had already assembled a team of angels to pull through this scholarship fund. Everyone was on board before the text was ever sent to us. The ball was rolling.

It only takes a spark, right?

I think this is a little more than a spark, as we are about to set things ablaze here.

Leadership. Jennifer, you are an outstanding example of that.

I just completed reading book called "Stepping Up", by John Izzo Ph.D.. The whole book gives real life examples of where people saw a need and decided that they were the best possible person to address that need, so they stepped up--thus change. The book says that change does not happen because people have more resources (i.e. time and money), it happens because of grit, determination, dedication, and passion. Jennifer has everything we need for change. Girlfriend just done stepped up.

She loves our son and she loves camp. These two loves combine beautifully for a scholarship camper fund in Jackson's honor. This fund will send kids to camp that will not normally have the opportunity to go. As his parents, we are honored to see young  deserving children have the experience of a lifetime. They will learn everything I mentioned above, and then some.

How is that for a Footprints and Hope story?

If you are reading this, I am asking you to consider donating to this fund. This is exactly how we would want to remember our son.

Many people over the last 7 weeks have asked me, "What can I do?" or "How can I help?". Here is your answer. Plain and simple.

Jackson's Camp Scholarship Fund.

We will never have the opportunity to send him to camp, but this is a close second. If we cannot send him, lets send many many other campers there in his honor. For Russ and me, knowing that other young children will get to experience this little piece of Heaven makes us so very proud. We know that our angel will take care of them the entire time they are there, and they will have a life changing experience. Our son will have the impact we are craving through this fund, and it is one step closer to having the world know his name. He. Is. Amazing. We miss him and love him so much. This type of thing makes our days just a little brighter. It gives us strength. It gives us HOPE.

He will Always and Forever be a camper.


If you cannot think of an amount, let me help you and have some fun with numbers.

$5 --he was born in May, the 5th month

$7--that is $1 for every day they are at camp and he was born on the 7th of May :)

$12- that is how many years I spent at camp

$57.12--combine all the above numbers and you get that amount or even cooler...he was born on 5-7-12 :)

That is as cool as I can get with numbers. Anything past that is just pushing it and getting creepy.

We need $700 to send one camper to camp THIS SUMMER. We are already half way there with donations :)

I have always been a dreamer.

Here is the dream.

We need $10,000 for it to become an endowment fund. Can you imagine an endowment fund in Jackson's honor? I can. I believe in it. I know this can and will happen.

That is a whole lot of campers getting to go to camp every single year, just like we would send him to camp every single year. An endowment fund will go on for as long as camp goes on and will impact so many children.

Honor him by donating any amount to this fund.

Ask your employer if they have a matching program for charitable contributions. Many employers do! Even if they do not match, your donation is 100% tax deductible!

Here is the information you need to send a donation:

Make checks payable to:
YMCA Camp High Harbour

And mail checks or money to:
Jennifer Reeves Lancaster
1090 Christian Drive
Watkinsville, GA 30677

Thank you Jennifer for your dedication, determination and passion for camp and Jackson. You are an amazing, lifelong friend. You are a blessing in our life, and we are grateful for your love. All 3 of us love you very much.

It only takes a spark, to get a fire going.

My candle is lit, and this is me passing my light to you. What will you do? I hope you will donate and pass this along to other friends and family members. Share your light.

We are so very thankful.

“You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden.  Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house.  In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven." -Matthew 5:14-16

Love,

Emily and Russ

Out and About

“This is my wish for you: Comfort on difficult days, smiles when sadness intrudes, rainbows to follow the clouds, laughter to kiss your lips, sunsets to warm your heart, hugs when spirits sag, beauty for your eyes to see, friendships to brighten your being, faith so that you can believe, confidence for when you doubt, courage to know yourself, patience to accept the truth, Love to complete your life.”

We are out.

Out of the nest.

First big trip away from home, and so far....so good.

I am blogging from my iPad and I will be honest....I do not like it. I am going to keep this little post short!
We started our big trip out with a wedding in my college stomping grounds of Athens, Georgia. Go Dawgs!! Some wedding it was! It was fabulous. Perfect. Beautiful. So much fun in fact that I will have to blog about it more when we return home next week.











Now?

We are at the beach.




We are currently enjoying the sugary sand beaches of Florida! This trip has been just what the doctor ordered. We are enjoying each other, relaxing, and loving our little angel.







People told us to get away together...and we totally see why.

We may be away, but he is always with us. Yes, there may be only two sets of footprints in the sand when we would like for there to be three. He is not physically here, but he is here. We know it and we can feel it. That third set of footprints is on our hearts, and we will always be carrying him with us. Always and Forever.




We love you and miss you like crazy sweet angel Jackson!!!

We are having what we like to call a strict "No plan plan" week, and it is glorious. He is currently delivering some amazing weather and 100% sun!




Today we are off to eat lunch in one of my all time favorite places....Seaside! Every time you blink it is photo! Talk to me about a photography playground! I feel some good therapy coming on today :)

Then a little shopping, dinner and after that.....

I plan on whipping this guys tail at putt-putt.




Friends, I am asking you to come back on Monday, June 25 for a very special Footprints and Hope announcement. This is something that is very near and dear to my heart. Our son is doing amazing work and is working those angel wings!! You are going to want to hear about this, and you will want to be a part of it!! We are excited to share this story with everyone! Here is a hint- scholarship fund.

Monday, June 25. Do it.

Go Jackson Go!!

Our son is a rock star angel, you know.

Back to beach land and loving our angel.

Love,
Emily and Russ

A Love Letter

"An Angel in the book of life wrote down my baby's birth. And whispered as she closed the book "too beautiful for earth."
~Author Unknown

I am inspired to write a love letter to our sweet boy from my new friend, Sarah. This is different from my normal writing, but I am feeling a change-up.

Sarah and I both recently lost our babies. We both lost our first babies. Her little angel, Grace, and my Jackson are a little over one week apart. We are grieving together, and it has been a great source of comfort to have another mama walking at the exact same pace as me. We feel the same emotions, often at the same times. We are mama's to angels in Heaven, but we sure do wish with every fiber of our being that we could be mother's to those sweet babies on Earth. We will always be soul sisters, even though we have not met yet. We plan to though very soon! See you soon Sweet Sarah!

Go visit Sarah's blog. She is amazing and inspiring. You will love her. Lets support her and John with love and prayers.

On to my letter. No pictures today, just a letter.

Sweet Angel Jackson-


I sit here staring at a blinking cursor. 


What do you say when there is so much to say? Do you know how much you are loved? Do you know how much you are missed? Do you know how much we need you?

Your mama and daddy need you here. We need to hold you. We need to have you grasp your tiny little hand around our fingers. We need to see you stretch out those legs and kick those sweet little feet. We need to smell the top of your head, pinch those full little cheeks, and shower you kisses.  We need to wake up in the middle of the night to feed you and soothe you back to sleep in the rocking chair. We need to hear you cry and we need to hear you laugh. We would love to see a good gummy baby smile right now. We need to experience that look that babies give their parents the "oh, I do not know much about anything...but I know I love you" look. The look of pure comfort and joy, really. Sweet sweet baby love. We need all of it, and then some. And then some more.


Our arms are empty and we do not understand. We know you are happy and safe in Heaven with the Lord, but we would argue that you would be happier and safer right here in our arms. We know that much.

We thank you for some good days, some great sunshine, and love. We just wish that all of these things were shared with you right beside us.  Every second of every day makes us think of you, love you, and miss you. You have been an amazing angel to not only us, but to many other people. We are proud parents, and hope that you continue to keep up the good work. We know you would never let anyone down because you are just that good at what you do, and you heart is just that big. Your footprints are everywhere :) We may not get to watch you grow, but we do get to watch you do really incredible things from Heaven...and that is very very cool. We are proud parents. We are so very proud of you, sweet boy.


We watched this the other day and thought of you...We all miss you, even Lucy. 

You, Jackson Neil, are the love of our life. We will love you and miss you forever. We will cry tears and miss you everyday, until we close our eyes for the last time on Earth. We love you to the moon and back. We love you forever. We love you for always. 



Love,
Mom and Dad

A Perfect Day.

"What we have once enjoyed deeply we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us." - Helen Keller

On Friday, we went to the Arboretum for the first time since Jackson's Memorial.

We thought it would be a good time to go, as Saturday marked one month since the memorial took place.


Our hearts were in as good of place as we could ask for at this point, and we had experienced a "string of good days".


There was a good weather forecast.

 It was go time.

We had no idea what to expect or even how to feel. We knew it was time, but we also could have easily talked ourselves out of it if we really wanted to or half way tried.

One side of the mental battle sounded like....

"Oh, there is not enough time" 

"Maybe another day" or....

"Not today...."

And.....


"I just cannot do this." 

And the other side of the battle.....

"Oh,  there is plenty of time. Loads of it."


"This a perfect day. Just do it."

"Seriously?! Go. Now."


And...


"You BOTH can do this. Today."


Then came the tug-tug-tug at your heart.


Come see me Mom.


Come see me Dad.


I have a really nice day planned for you. 


Come see me.

It is almost like hearing James Earl Ray's voice from Field of Dreams in your head. When you get that kind of call, you have to 1) go visit your son immediately, with out haste and 2) build a baseball field in your back yard. Period.

So we answered.


And our son delivered.

 All anxiety, skepticism, and doubt that we had going into the Arboretum instantly went away upon arrival. The knot I am used to having in my stomach these days, took a vacation.We just felt good when we got there, and we felt good when we left. Everything in between was exactly what we needed.  It is almost like we found our center again.  We found balance and another dose of peace. If we were hypothetical cars, we got our alignment checked, we are no longer "pulling to the right".

It was exactly what the doctor ordered.

We were exactly where we were supposed to be.

There was life and beauty everywhere.

It was peaceful and calm.

There were places to sit and reflect.

Places for the most perfect quiet time.

There was so much sun.  So much, in fact, that we had to be careful to not get "crispy" out there :)

Our son bringing the noise with the sun.

We basked in it. We loved it. We needed it.

We love him.

 Always. Forever.

Hey there little one!

We walked and walked and walked.


We even got our learnin' on.

Bonsai exhibit anyone?

We could kill a test on bonsai trees. I am not real sure what to do with this knowledge, but maybe one day we will be a on a trivia team and we can be "those players" on the team. When someone asks, "hey, who knows a ridiculous amount about bonsai trees?"....we can proudly display this new knowledge. Personally, I have always wanted to be a clutch player on a team and bonsai tree knowledge may just be my ticket.

Random knowledge, but certainly not useless.

That's how I like to look at it.

After bonsai land, it was time for us to make our decent into the amphitheater.

This could have induced a knot in the stomach, or chest tightening anxiety attack....

But instead, we felt this....

Lots of love.

The photo was intended to be a heart. Russ thinks this looks like two Moray Eels fighting. He also believes himself to be Jack Hanna. More on that later.

 

We chose to walk down into the amphitheater the way we came for the memorial. It felt so much longer than it did that day. It was quiet and no one else was around. It was just us 3. It was peaceful, but kinda eerie at the same time. It was awesome and totally weird. I could still hear the music that the band played as we were walking down in my head. I could see the sea of color from the family and friends in attendance still sitting there in the amphitheater. It felt like a cheering section. A legion of people saying "You can do this! We are here for you!".  It was beautiful. Exactly how we left it. Exactly how I wanted to, and will always remember it.

We just took it all in.

No words.

Just being present. Together.

We sat down in the exact same place. We breathed, remembered, and cried. One month without our angel. One month of sadness and heartbreak. One month of missing him. One month of needing him. One month of trying to make sense of the world without him.

We have been so positive and hopeful. We still are.

It is a part of the healing process to go back to the source of pain, and deal with it. We are healing and we are still grieving. We probably always will be. Grieve and heal. Grieve and heal.

The Arboretum is not a source of pain. It is a wonderful place to help us heal, and a perfect place for us to grieve. A place to let it out and know that our son is with us every step of the way. It is somewhere we can always visit him, and we will. The pain is in the loss, not at the place where we chose to remember his life.

We just miss him. He has our hearts. Completely. He may have tiny baby hands, but he has a kung-foo grip on our hearts.

It really was the most perfect time. A perfect day to remember and honor our son.

After we sat in the amphitheater for a while, the big shade trees were inviting us to come sit for a spell.

So much reflection. So much emotional release. So much healing. It was a natural pain reliever.

We saw some birds and butterflies passing through, and our hearts skipped a beat. Mama loves a good butterfly, you know.

Even though a tiny life was not there physically with us, life was there. We could feel and see it. He sent us the reminders we needed. We are thankful for a little angel who knows how to deliver. These broken down parents needed every minute of it.

We love you to the moon and back Jackson Neil.

After our time in the amphitheater, we decided to continue our walk through the Arboretum. It seemed like a good time to do some exploring, or to "walk it out" as I like to say.

 A picture for you, Abby! Found it all by itself :)

This part of our day is quite funny.

We are just walking and walking. Actually, we were both in unicorn land. You know, that place where you see the coolest things? You believe anything and it is just a happy, happy place.

Conversations like...

"Oh, look a butterfly!" 


"Look at the hummingbird! Do you see it?!"


"Check this out!"

It is a super cool place. I like to hang out there, and often. It has been hard to visit lately, but I welcome it when it shows up. I love me a good unicorn.

 In other words, we were completely oblivious to things around us.

Russ had just made the statement, "I feel like there are snakes here".  He says this as we are practically skipping merrily around the Arboretum.

Not cool Russ. Not cool.

Anyone who knows me, knows that I despise a flippin' snake. Cannot. Stand. Them. I do not even like to be in the same room as a snake. If they come on TV, I change the channel.  The movie Snakes on a Plane, forget about it. Anything that can slither faster than a person can walk, is no friend of mine. As far as I am concerned, they are all poisonous and they are all going to bite me.

I had just gotten done taking a picture and pulled the camera back down to view it....and at the same time 

Russ and I almost stepped on this big fella....

I cleared a 4.4 second 40 yard dash. I ran like it was my job. I did the high knees run too. Completely left Russ, aka Jack Hanna, with the ferocious beast. I know I made up a cuss word, and got the hell outta there.

I hauled it up to this opening where one path meets another and saw a couple of guys coming up from the other direction. I know that I was acting like Chris Farley in Tommy Boy, except shouting "Killer bees! Killer Bees! Save yourself!"....I was winded, hunched over and saying "There is a large snake down there...just right there...save yourself!". I was doing some kind of weird hand movement that was like windshield wiper motion and was panting like a dog on a hot summer day.

The men just kept walking. Unfazed and certainly not coming to the rescue. I think....or I know....they thought I was koo koo crazy.

Unicorn time came to a screeching halt. All because of a snake. Damn snakes ruin everything. Good for nothing.

After I calmed down (slightly), I called down to Russ because my rear end was NOT going back down that path. Apparently since I left the scene, he and the snake had decided to become best friends. Neat. His response?

"Oh, it is just a rat snake. Just a rat snake. Gosh it is the biggest rat snake I have ever seen! It is over 5 feet long! It is not poisonous. Man this thing is huge! It is just sitting here.  Did you see it? We almost stepped right on it!"

Thanks, Jack. Thanks for nothing.

I was fit to be tied. Where there is one, there has to be more. I was just sure we were going to come across a whole tribe of them. If we encountered more...I was ready. Ready to run like hell.

Russ informed me that snakes do not travel in packs. Awesome.

Can't find the snake in the photo above? Good. I was about 900 yards away.



Eventually, Russ was able to coax me into coming back down the path. How? I have no idea. I high stepped it back down the path, and we got back to walking. The hair on my neck was still at full attention and I had the willies for the next hour. Despise a snake, love a good unicorn. I am real, real sad these two things had to meet up on the same day.

We joke about the snake, and it actually felt good to laugh over something like that. I know I was ridiculous. I know I caused a scene. I know it was a funny thing that went down. At the end of it all, it felt good for us to laugh and mean it. Life moving forward? We think so.

We stopped along the way to talk, breathe, laugh and even wipe tears off our cheeks.

Love a good lilly pond. We sent wishes for all three of us. Wishes for hope and healing. We gave thanks for some good days too.

We stopped by the learning center and greenhouse.

Got some more learning in for the day.

Almost as cool of knowledge as bonsai trees. Almost.

We asked for directions to an exhibit called "The Quilt Garden". My mom had asked us to find it, and let her know what we saw.

It was really, really cool. It was beautiful. It was something special.

See for yourself.

Name that pattern quilters!

If I know my patterns like I think I do, this little gem is a Log Cabin.

Boo ya.

This particular part of the Arboretum is a special one. Quilts are a big part of our lives, and are a source of comfort for us. We appreciate them and love them. My mother has seen the power of quilting and its positive effect on people's lives. Quilting brings people together. Quilting and quilts alone heal people. We usually are never without a quilt. There are quilts in every room. We take them on all trips, big or small. They even go to the hospital with us.

Jackson has a quilt that my mom made months before he came. I received it at his first shower at the beginning of March. We lovingly built a nursery around this quilt. My mom designed this pattern for her book. It is called "Sunnyside". It is ironic that this quilt has only beautiful suns all over it. Even more reason for us to feel how we feel when we get a moment outside and the sun hits us just right. 

It was, and will always be my favorite pattern she has ever designed. It will always be my favorite quilt she has ever made.


An aqua quilt for the aqua man (the nursery is aqua, white and tan), and suns because our boy is the sun. He would have loved this quilt. I take that back. I know he loves this quilt.


We will put a label on the inside of this quilt for our next child, as this quilt will be a gift from big brother Jackson.

 

It currently waits in the nursery for a brighter days. This quilt will get the love it deserves. It will see happiness again. It will get dragged around the house, cuddled with, loved on, used to make a great fort or a cape, danced on, snuggled with during a sick day, taken on every trip and wrapped up under during movie nights. This is how I remember quilts growing up, so that is the life this little quilt will know.


And my mom will be there to patch up the quilt, so it can have a long healthy quilt life....and she probably will crank out a few more quilts along the way :) Just sayin'.

Back to the scenery.

Quilts. Good stuff right there.

This guy now loves a good quilt. Officially converted over. Just how we like it :)

After The Quilt Garden, we had seen just about all of the Arboretum. We did a little more walking and talking, and made our way towards the car. We saw a sweet older couple taking their picture underneath an arbor, and that just made our hearts smile. Sweet and perfect. You wonder if that is what you will be doing in 50 years.

Absolutely.

Ah, a good gate. Can I get an Amen that this will be a cute photo op with a little muse one day? 

The Arboretum really was a perfect day. We are so glad we went, and we know we can go anytime we want. Our son is with us all the time, but there is a different type of feeling we get from him when we are there. It is just like going to church.


Thank you sweet angel Jackson for a great day. We love you and miss you, all day everyday. Thank you for helping your mom and dad's heart heal just a little bit.

Time for some Footprints and Hope stories.

My favorite time. These stories make us so happy. I just had no idea how many people really really loved our son. A child beloved by so many. It is mind blowing. Every story glues our heart back together one tiny piece at a time.

Keep on loving him. He is amazing, and so very loveable. We are happy to share our angel with everyone.

Butterfly sightings.

I have the opportunity to work with a band of total rock stars. They are wonderful people, and I am very grateful to get to work with all of them. They have all be unbelievably supportive during this time, and I know they are going to be fabulous in helping me transition back to work in a few weeks.

Just a few days ago, one of them who attended the memorial shared with me a butterfly sighting. During the memorial when the sun came out for just a few minutes, she saw a butterfly! It went up, down, back up and eventually flew away were she could not see it anymore. About the time it took off, the sun was making an exit too. She shared this with me after she read the post about his garden. She saw how connected I was to the iron butterflies, and thought that I definitely needed to hear about what she saw!

Another counterpart shared with me that she saw a butterfly the day after Jackson passed away. She was sitting at a stop light, and a butterfly just zipped right across her front window. She immediately thought about Jackson. That was a tough day for everyone, and that little butterfly helped her feel a little better on a sad day. She felt his presence.

Thanks for sharing your stories sweet friends! We hope you see many more butterflies!

Tomorrow we are attending Love Not Forgotten support group meeting. We are ready and it is time. We know it will not be easy, but we are looking forward to meeting other couples in the area that are in the same boat as us. Strength is numbers. Healing in numbers.

Time to share some hope and hopefully get some hope in return.

Thank you for reading and coming with us on our journey. Much more to share this week.

"How very softly you tiptoed into my world. Almost silently, only a moment you stayed. But what an imprint your footsteps have left on my heart."- Anonymous

We miss you angel.

Love,
Emily and Russ